My middle school daughter was bullied and sexually harassed by a boy at school on May 9, 2022. He encouraged other boys to join in with the harassment. My daughter went with a friend to report this that same day and talk to the school principal Stephen Langford. He thanked her for coming to him with a difficult thing to talk about. He called us that afternoon to tell us what had happened. We thanked him for his support and assistance. He said he would handle it with the boy.
The next week, on May 16, 2022, I got texts and a call from my daughter late in the school day about an incident that took place earlier in the day that involved the boy that had sexually harassed her. He had thrown a water bottle across the classroom, hitting her in the back of the head. He said it was an accident and apologized. Some friends who witnessed what happened expressed concern for my daughter and the safety of other kids in the school, because this boy had also allegedly been heard talking about guns. Another student who had accompanied my daughter during the first incident on May 9, said that she had mentioned the talk about guns then to Mr. Langford, but he didn’t seem concerned about it. A couple of students, independent of my daughter, decided to make anonymous STOP IT reports about the boy’s treatment of my daughter and the discussion of guns that made them uncomfortable. Shortly after the reports were sent the morning of May 16, the student was removed from class and questioned and his backpack searched by police officers. No guns were found. It was determined there was no imminent threat.
Carroll ISD uses STOPit, an online and app-based system, to empower students, parents, teachers and others to anonymously report anything of concern to school officials – from cyber-bullying to threats of violence or self-harm.
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Unfortunately one of the two anonymous reports had been exaggerated regarding guns and a threat to the school, along with the truthful information about bullying and sexual harassment directed towards my daughter. My daughter told the other student not to include the exaggerated claims, but the student did anyway.
At this point, the situation became traumatic for my daughter. The principal, Stephen Langford, called her down to his office. She was questioned about who made the anonymous reports via the STOPit system. The principal asked her to tell him the identity of the students who made the reports. She was asked about her relationship with those students, and if she had influenced them to make a false report. She had not. She was asked if she had hatred for the student that sexually harassed her, and if she wanted to cause trouble for him. She was questioned by the male principal alone in a room near the front office. My husband and I were not contacted.
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She was also interviewed alone by the school resource officer, Anthony Pate, who is a uniformed and armed Southlake police officer. He is listed on the school website staff page and has a Carroll ISD email. He also has a designated office at the school. She was crying during the questioning and had a panic attack. Eventually a female staff member passing by asked if she wanted some water. Alone with the police officer, she was told she had to write out a student statement. She told the officer that she didn’t know how to start it and what to write. Officer Pate instructed her on what to write to get started. He asked to see her statement to review it before he gave it to the principal. My husband and I were not contacted and informed of this police interview. Officer Pate also asked to see her phone, but she did not have it with her at the time. If, as Mr. Langford has stated, my daughter was not accused of any wrongdoing, why would Officer Pate need to see her phone?
My daughter has a congenital heart condition. Shortly after birth, at 10 days old, she had to have a 12 hour open heart surgery to save her life: Transposition of the Great Arteries, Coarctation of the Aorta, Ventricular Septal Defect and Atrial Septal Defect. She said she felt like she couldn’t breathe due to the panic attack while being questioned by the principal and police officer. With her heart condition, it’s important to be aware of these physical reactions to severe stress. During the questioning, she asked to go to the nurse to take her medication, and she was allowed to do so.
She was detained during her lunch period and only given a few minutes left to get something to eat. She was asked by the principal and police officer if she knew how serious this was. They discussed with her the potential for juvenile criminal charges for the student that had allegedly included falsified information in the anonymous report.
This meeting and interviews with my daughter took place about 10:15 am. We were not notified at all by anyone from the school. As soon as I found out what happened from my daughter that afternoon, I sent the principal an email with my concerns and questions. He called me within a few minutes after I sent it. About 5 hours had passed since my daughter was questioned. He was apologetic from the beginning and expressed regret for his mistakes in not contacting parents. He said he owed my daughter an apology. I thanked him for that.
I was very bothered and concerned about what would happen with my daughter’s written statement that was collected by Officer Pate. Langford assured me on the phone call that it would be kept with him and shredded at the end of the school year. He also assured me that my daughter had not been accused of wrongdoing. But I questioned that since the methods he and school police officer Pate had utilized with my daughter signaled an interview and interrogation of my daughter, particularly in light of instructing her to write out a statement with police officer Pate while under duress.
My husband and I were not contacted, and the school proceeded with the interview without our knowledge and consent. We were not given the opportunity to attend the interview as required for questioning of students, as outlined in the code of conduct in the school district handbook for the 2021-22 school year. The potential imminent threat had already been safely assessed, with the student in question in the anonymous report having been removed from the classroom and backpack searched. Bringing my daughter in for questioning took place after this occurred, so they knew there was not an “imminent threat” as referenced in the Student Handbook code of conduct. I know that the school also did not notify the parents of another student brought in for questioning related to this matter.
From the Carroll ISD 2021-22 Student Handbook and Code of Conduct page 58:
The next day I emailed Mr. Langford again to follow up with some questions I had after our call. I asked him to put in writing to us what would be done with her written statement. Who will review it? Where is it stored? How long is it stored? Is this kept in her student file?
He answered:
First and foremost, I sincerely apologize for the lack of communication yesterday. I own that 100% and will be better moving forward.
Questions concerning the written statement:
Who will review it? I am the only person that has seen the statements or will see the statements.
Where is it stored? My office.
How long is it stored? It will be shredded on the last day of school and will not be placed in any student files.
I replied: Are you sure that’s correct? [my daughter] said Officer Pate also saw the statement as he had to review it before she turned it in.
The principal replied: Officer Pate did review the statement, but I am the only school employee that has seen the statement. I can assure you these statements will be destroyed.
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It really disturbs me that Mr. Langford was dishonest with me that he was the “only person” who viewed my daughter’s statement and initially did not divulge the truth that police officer Pate also read it. How can we be sure he is telling us the truth that no copies were kept in her school file or with any other school personnel?
It grieves me that my daughter has been made to feel as though she’s the one who is accused of wrongdoing, because she came forward to a school official who should be a trusted adult. This traumatic experience highlights the risk victims take in reporting bullying and sexual harassment. The adults in charge made her feel unsafe to report further harm. It is important for kids to understand how serious it is to make reports, and that in those reports they must tell the truth as best they know. School officials must be aware of the consequences when they mishandle methods and protocol of interviewing students when they feel pressured to identify other students who have made anonymous reports using the Stop It system. Kids must feel safe to utilize this system without fearing public identification and retribution.
Coming forward with reports of bullying and sexual harassment is difficult for anyone, but especially kids. An accusatory line of questioning of kids who report misbehavior in schools inhibits them from coming forward in the future, as well as feeling supported that they will be believed. Framing questions in an accusatory manner, violating their rights to parental notification and attendance in an interview, being required by a police officer to write a statement without parental notification, and while under duress of a panic attack, does not inspire trust and confidence that victims of bullying and sexual harassment will be treated with respect and support.
I hope that public exposure of this unsettling experience can help to educate my daughter’s school and the Southlake Carroll school district and others on the necessity of training and following the standards set for students when they come forward to report bullying and sexual harassment. Framing questions in an accusatory manner, like “do you have hatred for…” and “are you trying to cause trouble for…” blames victims and stifles open communication to help ensure a safe environment for all.
This experience also highlights issues with school resource officers on school campuses operating as uniformed, armed law enforcement officers working alongside school officials involved with students. School Resource Officers need to be educated and trained on the code of conduct to protect the rights of students. School administrators and police officers should not be meeting with students without parental notification. Officer Pate is a Southlake police officer paid by the City of Southlake for his full time work as a school resource officer.
The excuse that he is not paid specifically by the school district is a technicality and does not dissolve him from the specific Code of Conduct that governs behavior of both students and school staff. The Code of Conduct for questioning students addresses the involvement of law enforcement officers.
On May 18, 2022, we received a school-wide email from principal Langford that he is resigning. “It is with mixed emotions that I write this letter to inform you that I am resigning as Dawson Middle School principal. I was approached and given a new opportunity outside of education and I feel like this is an opportunity for me and my family that I cannot pass up.”
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In the days since, our daughter has had difficulty sleeping and concentrating on finishing the school year well. She has had nightmares that she is called back to the office and gets yelled at by Mr. Langford. Other friends, previously uninvolved, also get yelled at in her nightmares.
At our request, my husband and I had a meeting at the school with Mr. Langford and Officer Pate on May 25. It lasted about thirty minutes. We hoped to adequately have our concerns addressed. That did not happen. Mr. Langford agreed at the end of the meeting to allow us to see him shred our daughter’s original statement. We also received a copy. He was unwilling however to sign an affidavit affirming that no one else will have a copy of her statement, and that it will not remain in her school file or in the possession of any other school personnel. When I expressed distrust, because he had not been honest with me twice when I asked him who all has seen the statement, Mr. Langford, said ”I don’t care.”
During the meeting, we learned that Officer Pate had also filed an incident report with the Southlake police department. My husband asked how we can request a copy. Officer Pate gave us a card with a police supervisor’s contact information to request the report. Upon asking if we had consulted an attorney, and hearing that we had, Officer Pate bluntly stated, ”then I’m out,” and walked out of the room.
We did not get any indication from Mr. Langford or anyone else from the school that they have or will address the bullying and harassing behavior of the male student. I asked Mr. Langford during the meeting if there has been any discipline of the student after he sexually harassed my daughter and then threw and hit her head with a water bottle. He said he wouldn’t talk about other students with us. I clarified that I wasn’t asking specifically what type of discipline was involved, just asking has there been any at all?
I recorded our meeting at the school. It is about 30 minutes long. Texas is a one-party consent state in which you are legally allowed to record a conversation if you are a contributor or with prior consent from one of the involved parties. The names of students have been redacted.
A few minutes into the meeting, at about the 2:40 mark, Officer Pate is discussing the contents of the STOPit report and questioning our daughter. I discussed how detaining our daughter for questioning in the manner that he and Mr. Langford did, violated the code of conduct as outlined on page 58 in the Carroll ISD student handbook as referenced earlier in this post. Officer Pate asked “What code of conduct?”
At approximately the 24:00 mark, Mr. Langford confirms that there was no longer an “imminent threat“ when they questioned our daughter alone for an extended period of time and required her to write a statement, without parental notification and attendance, while under duress. She was treated like she had done something wrong as a victim of verbal and physical bullying and sexual harassment. She had to face it alone, because the adults in charge at a supposedly excellent school failed her.
